Every year, as homecoming approaches, countless girls utter something similar to the following phrase: “Someone better ask me in a cute way so I have something to Instagram.” I would add the obligatory high-pitched laugh at the end, but that’s not good writing.  As for boys, I can barely keep up with the number of public, and/or overly elaborate proposals to homecoming that I see on a yearly basis, whether it be at football games, pep rallies, or even just in a busy hallway in the morning.  Shouting “SQUAD,” might be the appropriate stereotypical catchphrase here, but I digress.

   The point is that nowadays, there is enormous pressure for boys to ask girls to homecoming, prom, or any other function in a way that is considered “cute,” and that in turn, girls face considerable pressure in the form of public proposals; the misguided male response to the misguided female desire.  Both of these problems, however, show an overarching theme.

  Ever since someone decided to up the ante by asking a girl to homecoming in a “cute” way, many girls have come to not just want this, but expect this.  This is ridiculous, as you are being asked to a homecoming dance, not to marry someone.  Of course, if a boy doesn’t ask in a way considered “cute,” then the girl most likely gets disappointed and complains about it in public or in private, and may even decline the request.  This irks me to no end, as it shows just how spoiled people have become.  We live in a world where instant gratification runs rampant.  As evidence, one only needs to look at the fact that there are young children given the latest iPhone, Grand Theft Auto, and LeBron James jersey.  Thus, kids our age are conditioned to think they should get whatever they want, whenever they want.  As a result, since one girl got a cute homecoming request, things have escalated to the point that everyone wants one.  Don’t even try to deny it.  If no one had ever done it, would someone honestly expect that?  The point here is that it’s beyond selfish, as many girls do not even think about the pressure that boys face to do something that their prospective date deems “cute.”  If you are a girl who is asked, or may be asked to homecoming, be grateful you are in that position instead of worrying about how that request is going to come.  Otherwise, you are showing how pretentious you really are.  In other words, worry about the intent of the proposal.  A proposal is a proposal.  Now, I’m not saying boys can’t ask in a cute way.  It should be at their discretion though, as they are the ones who have to plan it.

  Now, in order to deal with this selfish mentality, more and more boys have turned to the nauseating concept of a public proposal.  The idea behind this is that, “Oh, by making myself vulnerable risking a public rejection, she’ll have to give me a yes, in which case I get what I want.  If she gives me a no, she’ll feel bad around her peers.”  It’s a move that once again reveals the sense of entitlement that has girls acting selfish as well.  If you are willing to make a girl feel bad around her friends, or anyone for that matter, just to risk getting what you want, then you are no better than the people demanding a cute request.  Not only that, but what is wrong with a private request?  It is far more personal, and puts less pressure on both parties involved, as you attract less attention to yourselves, unless of course, you want this attention, further proving your selfishness.  Once again though, it is important to look at the intent of such a proposal.  If you are publicly proposing for attention, to make yourself look brave, or to pressure a girl into a decision, then you are part of the problem.  However, if you honestly want to ask in an elaborate, adorable, and public fashion because you have strong feelings for this person, then more power to you.

  The bottom line here is that people are selfish, as evidenced by the climate of entitlement we see today.  Girls expect something just because others have gotten it, and boys are willing to make girls feel bad to get what they want.  If a boy wants to make a sweet request, then they can, but it should not be expected by a girl.  If a boy wants to make a proposal, don’t make it public just to glorify yourself and pressure a girl into a decision.  If it must be public, then it should be due to strong feelings for this person, not strong attraction to attention.  While I don’t expect anything to change after this is published, I’m hoping I at least reached someone.